my life, my pace

I know, I know.  I disappeared for awhile there.  Hopefully I haven’t lost all two of my readers with my little vanishing act, but I was just so ready for a vacation from everything, including blogging.  But now, it’s a new year and I’m back…and with plenty of gossip.

I was cautiously looking forward to a mostly inlawless holiday season because mother-in-law and the two brothers-in-law claimed to be going out of town to ruin someone else’s Christmas.  I suspected it was too good to be true and I was right.  Turns out the plane tickets were too expensive and no one bothered to inform my husband or me of their change in plans.  So Christmas day I find myself at their house yet again with everyone acting awkward, awkward, awkward.  It didn’t help that sister-in-law’s miniman was there yet again.  They’ve only been dating for six months or so and yet he’s coming over for all holidays and sleeping in the same bedroom as her and everything.  I don’t understand how she is getting away with this because just two years ago, mother-in-law flipped out when she bought queen-sized bed sheets because she thought it meant sister-in-law was living with her man-of-the-moment.

And did I mention that this miniman is an absolute sleaze? Yeah, I can’t even look at him straight because I’m scared he’s undressing me with his eyes.  He was super flirty with sister-in-law’s 17-year-old cousin.  So flirty that even my usually completely oblivious husband noticed.  And all in front of sister-in-law’s face.  I’m sure in her delusional mind she was thinking that his behavior indicated that he would be great with kids.  Yeah, sure, great at molesting kids maybe.

But despite all of his sketchiness, my husband’s family seems to be embracing him and treating him with the utmost respect.  Too much, even.  I firmly believe that their behavior has something to do with the fact that he’s Caucasian and they’re not.  As an outsider looking in, what I see is them acting totally submissive because they subconsciously think he’s better than them because he’s Caucasian.  I called my husband out on it, but he denied it.  Then in the next breath, he’s talking in the most submissive tone possible to this sleazebag. He doesn’t even speak so sweetly to me.  It really made me sick.  And it made me really want to open my mouth and treat him how he deserves to be treated. But, unfortunately, it just wasn’t my place and I knew it.  So I kept my mouth shut even though it drove me absolutely crazy to do so.

Then it was time to open gifts.  But it was just my husband and I doing the opening.  Because they were incredibly impatient and just had to open their gifts at midnight.  I wasn’t expecting much, but somehow, they still managed to disappoint.  Not only that, but sister-in-law, the very same sister-in-law who shows up each time with a different LV or Kate Spade or Coach bag and whose eyes light up every time any brand name is mentioned, blatantly gave me re-gifts.  It’s kind of hard to pretend you like a men’s grooming kit.  And expired lotion.  I kid you not.  Too bad I didn’t discover the fact that the lotion was expired until later.  Or else I would have completely rubbed it in her face right then and there.  Quite literally, in fact.

So, yes, long story, but after that little discovery, I decided that I don’t give a crap about sister-in-law ending up with a pedophile miniman who’s probably going to molest their children and cheat on her with his hot young dental assistant.  That’s what she gets for giving me re-gifts when I put a lot of thought and money into her gift. Oh yeah, and for being an utter and complete bitch.   I just have to remember to keep my own kids far, far away from this guy in the future.  At least I’ll have a good excuse for boycotting every single family function.