Monthly Archive for March, 2008

our prayers have been answered

Or not. I’m ever the cynic, so although I’m hoping against hope that what I hear is true, I’m prepared for it to all be a sham. “So, stop stalling and give us the news already!” you say?

Well…

*drum roll*

Not-so-dear brother-in-law finally broke up with his super-psycho-super-fugly girlfriend!

Yep, your eyes are not deceiving you. Against all odds, it has finally happened. So why am I still so pessismistic about the whole thing? Well, for many reasons.

1. Not-so-dear brother-in-law claims they broke up in December. Yet we only hear about it now. Even though he got into a big fight with my husband over her and not-so-dear brother-in-law could have easily ended it by telling my husband that she was out of the picture. But since I have no idea when exactly they broke up, it could have very well happened after that fight (though not likely based on the double entendres that were coming out of sister-in-law’s mouth during another visit around Christmas). Now, let’s give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he broke up with her after the fight. Then why didn’t he tell my husband sometime before now knowing that it was mainly her being such a pervasive negative part of his life that led to the destruction of my husband’s and his once quite close relationship?

2. They are still living together. Not in the same room, but in the same condo, in rooms that are right next to each other. Not to mention that it took them breaking up before he finally admitted that they were living together even though it was more obvious than global warming. And we all know that continuing to see and talk to each other everyday doesn’t really constitute a break-up, does it?

3. They’re still doing stuff together. Albeit it seems that it’s because they have so many mutual friends since she didn’t allow him to make any friends of his own. But still, in that situation, I’d make new friends. Again, just like reason #2, doing stuff together after breaking up doesn’t really constitute a break-up.

4. She seems to still be pining away for him (thank you, Facebook). Which makes the fact that they still live together and do stuff together extra scary.

5. I really cannot believe that this crazy psycho bitch actually let him break up with her without forcing him to stay by threatening suicide or some other crazy thing. So, really, it could all just be a big fat lie.

I think I have some valid concerns here, don’t you? I believe that when you break up with a person, you should always cut all contact for a period of time so that both of you can process the break-up and move on before resuming a friendship if such a thing is so desired. Somehow magically flipping a switch between doing the nasty every night to being just mere friends doesn’t seem too realistic at all and is just asking for failure and more drama. Not to mention the fact that no new love interest is going to be willing to date you with your ex looming so close, which then makes you think you’re undesirable, leading you to fall back into the arms of your ex.

Despite all these reasons, I try to remain cautiously optimistic because not-so-dear brother-in-law’s bout with this batshit crazy girl has taken him down a notch…or five. Two summers ago when he was here with passive aggressive cousin-in-law, not-so-dear brother-in-law acted like he was the shit and that he was better than me (we all know that he’s not even close to being in the same league). But now, he’s actually having to take an extra year to finish school because he needs to raise his GPA to be competitive for optometry school and because he needs more time to study for the OAT. Seriously?  Not to be a total snob, but optometry school is nowhere near as competitive as med school and his GPA is too shitty even for that?! And we all remember how he claimed many times over that he needed to go back to school during summers and breaks early to study for the OAT, what, TWO years ago?! And after more than two years of “studying,” he still hasn’t taken the damn test?! Again, the OAT is nothing compared to the MCAT. I know plenty of people who sucked at the MCAT but aced the OAT. What does that tell you? Of course, that super-fugly-super-psycho girlfriend totally dragged his ass down. The kicker here is she did just fine and is graduating on time and has gotten accepted to professional school. Gotta love that, right? Anyway, my point is that hopefully, if I am right, the reason he finally dumped her ass was because he finally, now that all of his peers are moving on and he’s not, has realized that she fucked him over badly and realizes that if he doesn’t want to become a complete loser, he has to get rid of her. If this is, in fact, his reasoning, then I have hope yet that he won’t end up back with her because there’s nothing this guy hates more than failure. That and the prospect of mother-in-law finding out her golden child is a failure must scare him more than anything. But do these things scare him enough to counteract all of the things he has going against him listed above?

What do you think? Will this break-up stick?

dear reader

I’ve noticed that there have been quite a few new user registrations on my blog as of late, but no new comments (which is pretty much what registration is for). To those of you who have registered lately and to my loyal readers, is there something more that you are looking for here? Would you like to better be able to interact with me and/or each other (e.g., a forum)? I’m open to mixing things up a bit, so feel free to leave me any suggestions or thoughts in the comments here or privately by sending me a message here.

contrary to what you may think…

I’m not an uptight know-it-all.

Yes, I preach a lot about making sure you know what you’re getting into when you decide you want to become a doctor. But that’s because I didn’t quite know myself (*gasp*) and because I see far too many people naively thinking that the junk on TV actually even comes close to portraying what it’s really like to be a doctor. Yes, it’s obvious that doctors treat illnesses, injury, and other health conditions. But what may not be obvious is that it’s not quite that simple. Every patient is different–some may listen to you, some may think they know more than you, and some just want to look for any excuse to sue you. You may want to become a doctor to help people, but many times, your hands are tied by bureaucracy and you can’t do anything about it but feel bad. Oh yeah, and the income to amount-of-work-you-have-to-put-in ratio kind of sucks when it comes to doctors (unless, of course, you go into derm or some other lifestyle specialty).

Also, despite my ragging on and on about how it’s not fair that people get ahead by kissing ass instead of working hard, I’m the biggest slacker you’ll ever meet. I never studied in high school and made it a habit to never study in college until 1-2 days (at most 2.5) before any midterm or final and graduated summa cum laude with more honors and awards than you care to read about here. I also only studied for a week before the MCAT and yet my numbers were awesome and I had no problem at all getting into medical school. I have my semi-photographic memory to thank for allowing me to be such a slacker. Even in med school, I slacked more than most and still made it through the first two years just fine. Yes, I worked harder than I’ve ever worked in my life, but not as hard as most of my classmates. Let’s not even mention grad school because it’s a complete joke compared to med school and I’m sure you get the point. I have no problem with slackers as long as they eventually get “serious” enough to know when to work when it matters. What I do take issue with are those who purposely skirt the rules and expect everything to be handed to them on a silver platter simply because they know someone…those who slack and have crappy numbers who just want a free ride while other slackers actually earned their way…those who have no sense of how much trust will be placed in them when they become doctors and do not take it seriously. I was taught by my favorite high school math teacher that the cream always floats to the top and maybe I was naive to believe it, but it is because of this belief that I can’t stand ass-kissers who actually get ahead not because they’re awesome in every way and deserve it, but merely because they kissed the right ass. I believe in people being rewarded for how awesome they are and not because of sneaky underhanded tactics.

So there it is. I hope we’re all on the same page now.

puppy fever

I’ve wanted a corgi ever since my first dog, which was likely a corgi/cocker spaniel mix, died during my second year of med school. But after adopting my current dog and then another dog and then realizing that I couldn’t quite handle taking care of two dogs alone, I decided that I would stick to my one very low maintenance dog.

But every once in awhile, I get bitten by the I-want-a-puppy bug and ask my husband if I can get a corgi. He usually says, “Okay” and we never speak of it again. Well, I was bitten again recently and asked my husband if I could get a corgi. This time, however, he responded with, “Let’s do it!” I still didn’t think he was serious, even as I watched him look up breeders. Then he started showing me pictures of available puppies and talking about deposits and such and it dawned on me that he was really serious. Which led me to back things up and tell him that I wasn’t serious about wanting a puppy…that it’s just one of those things that I want but can never find the time to have. Which got me the whole “life is short” (as if I need to be told that) lecture. Well, to make a long story short, there was no way I was going to be able to resist once I saw the cute puppies and found one to my liking. So now, we’re expecting a little bundle of fur come late May.

I’m a worrier by nature and I’m kind of freaking out about this whole thing now, especially because my last attempt at a two-dog household failed miserably. I blame it on my choice of second dog and hope that this time will work out. Well, I can’t really afford it not working out, can I? At the same time, I’m really excited at the prospect of finally being able to raise a puppy. I’ve never had that before…both my previous dog and my current dog were adopted. So it is with both excitement and trepidation that I look forward to our new addition…kind of like how I’m feeling about going back to the wards…

as the match nears, shadiness abounds

So, as you all know, Teacher’s Pet has been the bane of my existence in the lab for awhile now. I mistakenly thought that she had quit medicine because she cared too much about her patients or some other BS like that, but it turns out that she just quit her internal medicine residency and instead wants to get into another specialty. That’s why she hooked up with my major professor–because he’s in the department of her specialty of choice and she wanted an in.

Well, she applied this year and Match Day is tomorrow. She already knows that she matched and is waiting to find out where. And in the two days that I’ve been at the lab, all I keep hearing is, “If you match here…” or “Who knows…you might end up in Timbuktu…” or “Well, we don’t know yet if you’ll be here…” which is normal I suppose, but for some reason, has been sounding ultra sketchy coming out of my major professor’s mouth, the chair of the department’s mouth, and the chair’s minion’s mouth. They just all sound like they’re saying, “Duuuuuh. Of course you matched here. We made sure of it.” They might as well be wink-wink-nudge-nudge-ing when they say these things because it’s just that obvious. And that just makes me angry. I understand that these shady things happen and I probably can’t do anything about it but play the game. But does it really have to be so blatant? Bad enough that they’re screwing other people (who might have gone about the whole thing in an honest way…that would be novel, wouldn’t it?) over, but do they really have to broadcast it too?

Well, maybe I’m reading too much into things and I’m wrong. But I would be very surprised if she doesn’t match here. I guess we’ll find out soon enough.

awkward encounters of the ex-semi-boyfriend kind

I had a pretty tiring weekend and an extra tossy-and-turny-sleeping husband the last couple of nights, so I wasn’t quite 100% today. Even though I woke up early enough to primp myself up nicely, I chose to stay in bed a little longer and sleep in a bit. Who’s going to be at lab that I give a crap about anyway, right?

And since I was running around trying to get my immunization records all straightened out (since it seems the med school has magically lost all such information), I was kind of frazzled. As I turned into the hallway to my lab bench, I saw my major professor with someone, but didn’t really pay attention to who it was because I didn’t care and had better things to do. And he usually doesn’t introduce me to his visitors anymore–that spot’s been filled by Teacher’s Pet. So imagine my surprise when he calls out my name and makes me stop dead in my tracks, asking me if I remember his visitor. I take a look, and of course I do. It’s my ex-lab mate and his wife. Fun, I think to myself. And why, oh why didn’t I wake up early and pretty myself up? But then, I take solace in the fact that his wife looks scrubbier than me despite probably knowing full well that she would probably run into me, the chick who probably scarred her husband for life.* Awkward conversation follows and I beat a hasty retreat, glad that I didn’t stick with this guy because he got kind of chubby and still looks like a supernerd. Though I did feel kind of sorry for him because his wife looks and sounds like a bitch and he got chubby…

Even though things ended badly and I probably could have been nicer about “dumping” him, I’m good friends with his sister. We get along so well that I sometimes wish she was my sister-in-law instead of the bitch that I’m stuck with. Though seeing as to how they always come visit my major professor every time they’re in town even though he’s a narcissistic ass probably because his parents make them, I’m pretty glad I don’t have his parents as my in-laws. Ah, tradeoffs. Well, I’d much rather have my husband anyway, even if all of the in-law drama almost negates it. Guess that encounter triggered some introspection on my part, awkward as it was.

*DISCLAIMER: I didn’t purposely scar this guy for life. We were never even a couple. He’s just fragile. And took things way too seriously. And didn’t know when to back off. And never had a real girlfriend until he met and married his wife. So yeah. I’m no cold heartbreaker. Really. And no, I don’t know what the hell I was thinking getting involved with such a dork. We were all young and stupid at some point, right?

a taste of things to come

The grant that partially funds my salary includes several MDs as co-investigators. These MDs somehow find time in their oh-so-busy schedules to attend our marathon monthly meetings. I try to stay away from them because they seem kind of…mean. Especially this one peds guy who looks like he has a stick perpetually stuck up his ass. It doesn’t help that he seems to have something against my major professor and his work. Could it be perhaps that he knows that he’s a fraud?

Well, at one of these said meetings, I show up early because I want a seat far away from the chair of the department and as close to the door as possible. Mean Peds Guy is also early as well as a coworker of mine, Teacher’s Pet, and my major professor. Of course, I choose to converse with my coworker rather than talk to and feed my major professor’s narcissism. Being the narcissist that he is, he can’t stand sitting there unnoticed, so he opens his big mouth and starts talking to Mean Peds Guy.

MAJOR PROFESSOR: You know, she’s starting her rotations soon. [obviously referring to me]

MEAN PEDS GUY [looking like he could care less]: Oh really.

I give a sheepish half smile.

MAJOR PROFESSOR: Yes. So you’re going to be nice of her when she’s on peds, right?

MEAN PEDS GUY doesn’t say anything and just kind of looks pissy. And I really want to hide. But my major professor is not one to be ignored.

MAJOR PROFESSOR: You have to protect her.

MEAN PEDS GUY [barely able to pretend that he's joking when he says]: Well, we’re not nice to anybody in peds.

You see, I’m not like my major professor. I do not expect nor want special treatment. In fact, if I could ban all special treatment, I would. But now, because he opened his big fat mouth, Mean Peds Guy thinks that I think that I deserve special treatment. Peds is a hard enough rotation without having pissed off an attending, which is exactly what my stupid ass major professor just did to me. I’m thinking that I should change my identity and get some plastic surgery before peds so that he won’t recognize me and totally screw me over.

grand rounds 4.25

Don’t forget to check out Grand Rounds today at Canadian Medicine.