you don’t want to know (season 4, episode 8)

Foreman! She’s not wearing any underwear! You used to be more fun.

Ladies and gentleman! I have nothing in my hands.  Nothing in my sleeve.  I do have something in my pants, but it’s not going to help with this particular trick.

Too much trouble. Can I pick my nose?

Magic is cool. Actual magic is oxymoronic.

If the wonder’s gone when the truth is known, there never was any wonder.

If you’re gonna kiss his ass to protect your ass, at least wait until he has a good idea.

Are you acting stupid because you know you’re safe?

This is a little much for a first date.

I usually like to give the lethal blood to Foreman, but I’m the only one who’s type AB.

I finally have a case of lupus.

Let her greedy fingers into my cookie jar, which sadly is not as dirty as it sounds.

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  1. don’t ever change (season 4, episode 12)Why does scary need pathetic?The corollary to "people lie" is "people sin."If you prefer, I can give your wife my second-best diagnosis.KUTNER: So Amber dropped off Wilson today.HOUSE: Yes, the male always drives the female.Well, I wrote it in black. I'm always serious when use black.And I speak in Latin because I don't try to hide what an ass I am.He's in for it now. She's gonna hit him in the face with your testicles.Oh my God. You're sleeping with me.Either explain which part of my analysis didn't make sense or go do it....and pressure blood in direction wrong.I need you to sleep with Wilson.I've decided you can do worse than a female proxy for me.DISCLAIMER: All copyrighted content is the property of its respective owners....
  2. whatever it takes (season 4, episode 6) Ewwww. Cutthroat bitch has an iPhone!! CIA GUY: Dr. House? HOUSE: No. Lazy ass called in sick again. We can give him the message. Well, I assume you're gonna drop trou at some point during the dance and I don't why I should share. If I have to walk somewhere, there better be at least five girls involved and they better be working their way through college. Fifteen minutes for the lap dance, thirty minutes to scrub the guilt from my soul.  See you in forty-five. Any chance he's just overwhelmed with gratitude? If you had any real evidence of foul play, you'd be torturing Bolivians instead of putting me into a state of anticipatory sexual arousal. You know, I happen to have a position available on my penis. PLASTIC SURGEON GUY: Uh, where have you been the last two days? HOUSE: Overslept. Yeah, I cured depression with tonic water once.  That's it.  I think there was some gin in it too. DISCLAIMER: All copyrighted content is the property of its respective owners....
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